You feel on top of the world. You’ve been doing what you need to do to keep pushing yourself forward, to make you an emotionally stronger woman. And you’ve been doing fine for days, weeks or even months, and then one event happens that has you questioning your ability. You may start asking yourself “Who are you kidding thinking you can do this?”
I know that feeling inadequate sucks. But it’s not the end of the world, and I’ll show you why. Here are some steps you can do to snap yourself out of feeling inadequate.
What I have come to understand is that I have a choice if given that a situation is an obstacle, or is it a learning opportunity.
It is my decision to choose if I want to learn, or if I want to wallow around in self-pity, complaining about the injustices of life; or if I crawl back into bed pulling the covers over my head.
Learning involves action. Learning may cause emotional pain. Learning typically pushes you outside your comfort zone. Learning always involves personal growth.
I was recently on a business trip and spending the night in a hotel room when I had this feeling of being inadequate in my job. I began doubting my abilities. It’s the kind of feeling that starts in the pit of my stomach and I have a sense that impending doom is on the horizon.
When you start feeling like a failure, chances are you are allowing fear to creep back into your life. I know for me this type of fear is completely unfounded.
Recognizing that I was feeling fear, I started reviewing my day to see what triggered this feeling. I realized it had to do with a presentation I did earlier in the day with the Executive Team. The presentation went wonderful and was well-received. However, during the presentation I made a comment … okay, really more of a sarcastic remark … to one high ranking individual that I regretted.
Once I was able to identify what was causing my fear I felt some relief and was able to shake off the feeling of impending doom. I also knew that just identifying my fear wasn’t enough; I had to do something about it. In this case, I needed to apologize to the individual for my inappropriate comment.
Yikes! Scary thought. How much easier it would be just to ignore my comment and tell myself that I’ll never do it again. I could have also taken the justification path that this individual is a difficult person and was being unreasonable, and twist it in my mind that he deserved the comment.
But the fact is I knew I was in the wrong. I had to remind myself that apologizing WAS the right thing to do. Once I made the commitment to myself that I would do it the next day, the fear completely vanished.
The next day, when the opportunity arose, I apologized for making the comment. They acknowledged it (they did remember it!) and genuinely thanked me for the apology. I walked away feeling stronger for stepping outside my comfort zone and doing what I knew was the right action.
Lesson learned is when I’m feeling fear, I need to identify why and take action.
After reading this article what are you committed to? Leave me a comment below and let me know!