Are You Eating Lemons or Drinking Lemonade?
Recently, I was having coffee with friends, one of them is a divorced woman who was speaking about her limited finances since the divorce. Not an uncommon topic amongst divorced women.
What struck me is that typically the conversation is around ‘poor me’ followed by complaining. Instead my friend is in complete acceptance of her financial situation and she refers to it as ‘embracing thrift’.
When she stated this, we all laughed at the table since none of us had heard that before and she said it with such conviction and happiness.
Reflecting back on the conversation later, I was thinking about how much this particular friend has turned her viewpoint around from the poor me of not too long ago. She realizes that life is happening for her; not to her.
She has chosen happiness; she has chosen to step into a new life; she is embracing her new life. For her that means limited finances right now and she’s fine with that. She’s learned to live within her means and is content.
I could compare her life situation to those in similar situation and they choose to be miserable. Life is about choices; unfortunately some choose to live in the victim role. Life doesn’t need to be that way.
So what do you do if you find yourself eating lemons?
You need to come to acceptance with where you are at. Whatever the circumstances are around you; you need to accept that this is your reality. Complaining about it does nothing about the situation. It can bring depression on and frankly chronic complaining aggravates people around you because you are stuck.
The question you need to ask yourself is what are you doing about your situation to improve it? Sometimes the answer is that what you need to change is your attitude. You can make the choice to view your situation as a liability or you can view it as an opportunity.
When I first moved out on my own in my early twenties, I could barely scrape enough money together for food and gas for my car. Friends introduced me to Thrift stores. At first I was repulsed by the thought of having to ‘step down’ and actually shop there.
Then a friend point blank told me I had an attitude and just give it a try. Out of desperation of needing work clothes, I reluctantly went with a girlfriend who swore there were good buys if you knew where and what to shop for.
One of my early finds was a classic new wool skirt that I wore for years. I would often receive compliments when I wore it. Each compliment was a reminder to me about how much of a smart shopper I was. The thrift store didn’t change; my attitude about thrift stores is what change.
So are you drinking lemonade today?